Visualosities

[algidity]

"So you're all alone.
Maybe you've always been,
but today you've decided to
write a poem about it.

Where did you want to start?
Nowhere? I guess that's the point.

Okay.
So you're all alone.
You're all alone and the room isn't
crowded.
You're all alone and there's no sea of people.
You're all alone because you're all
alone.
Make it a bar, or your bedroom,
or your car pulled over on the highway.
You're all alone and you can feel it
deeper than your bones,
like there's a sun inside you and it's
imploding.
You're all alone and you aren't burning.
You're all alone but, oddly enough,
you're okay.
Why are you okay?

God, why the fuck are you okay?
Do you even need anything?
Are you even human?
Are you even real?
Hurt a goddamn little!
Bleed! Fuck!

What do you need? What do
you need to do? How can I pull this
out of you?

I've seen lonely, but that's not what
this is. This is surrender. This is you
tying yourself to a sinking ship and
it's breaking my heart, really.

I hope you fall in love and I hope it
kicks your ass, the first time.
I hope you fall in love again and I
hope it feels like swimming in molasses.
I hope you never get the sweet out
from underneath your fingernails.
I hope you open up like a sky."

— Caitlyn Siehl, So You're All Alone